XJO 0.30% 7,759.6 s&p/asx 200

xjoer's fess up friday

  1. 16,819 Posts.
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    It was awfully quiet on the XJO thread today with many of our regular contributors missing in action.

    It took your intrepid reporter only a couple of phone calls and a taxi ride to St Patrick's Cathedral to find the absent XJOER'S spilling out the doors lined up for the confessional.
    Sadly they had given up on the market and wished to repent


    As I gradually worked my worked my way forward through the immense queue with the camera crew in tow it soon became apparent that a sinner who looked suspiciously like Disco was locked in intimate discourse with His Holiness


    I glanced down and saw Stockie, next in line .He sighed lamentedly " he's been in there 3 hours .He keeps screaming 'but it's not my fault Father, Pisces told me to buy gold '"

    Oh dear ,I had no choice but to take a position next to Stockie and after a while Disco emerged,a shadow of his former self, thumbed his nose at the two of us and slank off smacking his lower palm against his forehead.

    Eventually it was my turn and as it'd been a while I started hesitantly " Bless me Father for I have sinned ,it's been 35 years since my last confession Father and these are my sins " I gradually unfurled the story of my sordid affair with the market leading to the current state of degradation.His Holiness was very patient and at the end sighed knowingly , " I understand my son , I myself bought Bluescope in 2007 and topped up all the way down, but I've had enough of it too , I'm selling out as soon as we're finished here ...what are they doing today by the way ?'

    'They're in a trading halt Father', I stammerred. His Holiness then let out a series of expletives that meant the next one in a confessional would be him . He came closer and whispered, " for your penance I want you to read every post of St.Martis for the last 10 days and repeat them 3 times .You can go now my son "

    As I got up to leave he hushed conspiratorialy " Oh Pisces " ...." Yes Father"......"You've come a bit late,the vatican's been offloading it's Gold for over 12 months "

    I emerged a little wiser to find Martis and his followers outside the chuch ready to offer support for their colleagues who were falling on hard times


    That was a lovely gesture Martis

    I so ever much wanted to discuss with Martis what we should do now but was devastated when he completely shunned me.

    For all of you XJOER'S who gave up the ghost yesterday you missed this:

    MONGO: 'I'll stick my neck out and say---I think we're done. Up now'
    REDBACKA:'Heavy volume today on a wide range day down.

    Volume on XAO at noon was around 800 million.

    Monday's total volume was about 860 million.

    This looks like panic selling. It could go on for another day - but this is getting close to a bottom.'

    and the coupe de grace.

    VOLTAIRE :'Extreme caution warranted here IMO.

    Martis's target could arrive very quickly.

    Tonight could be a shocker although Friday expiration may hold things till Monday.

    My reasons are there are many similarities with past crashes right now. Action looks like 1987 and 2008 to me.

    The fact I am worried means it probably won't happen.'

    Thanks for those comforting words at the finish Voltaire. You'll never know how much your gentle approach means to all of the shell shocked souls who assembled so remorsefully at St .Patrick's yesterday. You know who doesn't bother with such subtleties :

    My ultimate low predictions..

    DOW 2000 TO 3000
    XJO 500 TO 800
    CAC 400
    FTSE 600
    DAX 950
    HANG SENG 500

    .They're tiny numbers aren't they .Im glad I've kept the vegie garden.

    Now XJOER'S why go to church to reveal your sins .Today is the perfect time to get it off your chest on the XJO forum where you are guaranteed to get a sympathetic reception.

    I'm calling today " Fess up Friday " ,the one day of the year you can admit to every dumbass thing you've done in the markets and receive absolution for your mistakes .It'd be great if some of our more 'respected ' colleagues could give us a sentence or two outlining their humanity when they post today .Let's see if we can all learn from this bonding experience and get some good karma going.

    Go to it XJOER'S .

    I'm so humbled by your very kind reception that I'm sacking myself for the next few days. .Nobody could ever replace BiggDaddy but we're doing our best to fill the massive void whilst he's away which makes us strive that little bit harder .Put up your feet and relax Daddy .

    Here is Matis shunning me outside the church.

    Enjoy.
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