since no one feels like talking
STOCK MARKET TERMS - UPDATED FOR 2008
CEO: Chief Embezzlement Officer.
CFO: Corporate Fraud Officer.
BULL MARKET: A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
BEAR MARKET: A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewellery, and the husband gets no sex.
VALUE INVESTING: The art of buying low and selling lower.
P/E RATIO: The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
BROKER: What my broker has made me.
STANDARD & POOR: Your life in a nutshell.
STOCK ANALYST: Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
STOCK SPLIT: When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
FINANCIAL PLANNER: A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
MARKET CORRECTION: The day after you buy stocks.
CASH FLOW: The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
YAHOO: What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
WINDOWS: What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.
INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR: Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.
PROFIT: An archaic word no longer in use.
2008 stockmarket terms
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Last
1.5¢ |
Change
0.001(7.14%) |
Mkt cap ! $120.5M | |||
| Open | High | Low | Value | Volume |
| 1.4¢ | 1.5¢ | 1.4¢ | $37.39K | 2.531M |
Buyers (Bids)
| No. | Vol. | Price($) |
|---|---|---|
| 21 | 6021465 | 1.4¢ |
Sellers (Offers)
| Price($) | Vol. | No. |
|---|---|---|
| 1.5¢ | 9583602 | 29 |
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